Tomorrow

They will come and they will be hungry and I will delight them with food and they will feel loved and I will feel happy.

A Lesion of the Soul

Oh, and oh, and oh, the more I read, the less I know.  Then Rappaport, talking about Derrida talking about Benjamin and Freud: 'the opening toward a future which ... is the condition of all performativity [is that] ... the end is never anything other than a repetition of the end in which each moment is and is not identical to the others. [but that it is] ...a prior wounding or harming that is also and always part of the openness of future to come - a future at the crossroads of a truth and madness - a return to something traumatic that has happened in the past and that will come back at some time in the future.' Oh, and oh, and oh, where's it going?  I don't know.  Here's a poem about someone in my reading group who troubles me...

A Lesion of the Soul

Her teeth I notice first,

No, that’s not true of course.

Her visage, hurt to see,

All over irritated, cross.

Furrows grow between her eyes,

The mouth so tight, severe.

Reproof is writ on all she views,

Her words unhappy sneer.

Impatience covering all,

She callously pronounces.

Opinion raw and rough,

Dogmatic in her trounces.

So far I wish to flee that gaze,

But mesmerised I stay.

For down within her lonely eyes,

A sadness deeply lays.

Snow Angels

'Nuff said.

Yellow

A colour that apparently cries out for attention.  Originally made from arsenic and cow urine, it was used in the 19th century to create emotions.  Wikipedia tells us this about yellow:

'Yellow is commonly associated with gold, sunshine, reason, optimism and pleasure, but also with envy, jealousy and betrayal'

 Largely considered cheerful, yellow has a troublesome history: Judas Iscariot's robes depicted as yellow apparently, traversing through its iteration as The Yellow Wallpaper (Perkins-Gilman 1892 reference to 'a slight hysterical tendency') yellow also became synonymous with fin-de-siecle misdemeanor  in The Yellow Book before its particularly vile association with exclusion inherent in the wearing of a yellow star.

Gold, sunshine, reason, optimism and pleasure are infinitely more appealing sensations than envy jealousy and betrayal so it is with great effort that I choose to promulgate the necessary show of positivity to shove a load of daffodils onto my post instead of what I'm actually feeling right now!

Be cheered,  it'll be a temporary outbreak of wild emotionalism.  I think...